While I’m Away
This is not the usual love notes I write your nor the romantic one I had in mind. Because right now, this may be what I wanted but this is not what you need. The summer I had in mind was far from this. Yes I had thought of outings, mall visits and probably one or two overnights and a lot of rests. But the constant visit, all the worrying and the need to get to you took most of my time, I got tired but later realized I am thankful, because I get to spend these moments with you. I’ve seen you struggle, I’ve seen you fall, but I haven’t seen you this helpless. And I am sorry If the least I could do is send all my comfort and not able to do it personally right now. If this makes you feel any better, I worry for you and I worry with you on this. I stay late at night to accompany you and I wake up early because I know you’re already up by then. Your fears are mind as well but I don’t let it get to me. Because at times like this, I need to be the strong one right? Don’t be helpless, be hopeful instead. Don’t let your fears and worries overcome you, show them you are more than that. Show them you are stronger than that. Because you are. And I’ll be here always reminding you that. If not me, your family and friends are always there, although you seldom see it. Besides, your Father up there is stronger than any of us, any of these, and I bet you He’s not going to let any of His children suffer this much. Just trust Him. Here’s to not giving up and getting better.
And just in case I don’t say it often enough, I love you. And I’ll always be here for you love.
“The good times and the bad times both will pass. It will pass. It will get easier. But the fact that it will get easier does not mean that it doesn’t hurt now. And when people try to minimize your pain they are doing you a disservice. And when you try to minimize your own pain you’re doing yourself a disservice. Don’t do that. The truth is that it hurts because it’s real. It hurts because it mattered. And that’s an important thing to acknowledge to yourself. But that doesn’t mean that it won’t end, that it won’t get better. Because it will.”
—John Green (via carnalitea)
I’m not this hopeless.
I’ll still watch your movies and read all your books. But fuck you nicholas sparks for making me believe in sappy happy endings.